What You Want Has Great Bearing on What You Believe and What You Do

I am amazed at how easily I can justify something evil when it looks good to me.  I have done it for years.  There is a great problem that I have seen, and I find that my life here on earth is one day in victory and one day in the dump.  There is a great burden that falls when one knows the truth and sins in spite of it.  I have knowingly sinned against my God because the pleasure of sin seemed better at the moment.  Have you been there?  Maybe you are there now, thinking of something that seems more pleasurable than God.  I have even fought my urge with shouting and vehement anger as the talons of lust tear into my flesh, or the slow squeeze of pragmatic dishonesty pressures me into a trap.  Once the offence was given, I would seethe with regret and heavy guilt.  Have you been there?  Begging to God to forgive and take away the temptations of the flesh, the desire to sin, and the guilt within? Maybe you were blindsided as I was to fall into a deep dark chasm of guilt because of a lasting financial decision based on poor planning and the want of the flesh to have a dwelling place of its own.  Allowing financial institutions to lay their 30 year trap and enslavement.  Maybe you've been there.  Maybe you have asked for forgiveness and know that God has forgiven you; but, the lasting effect of your previous transgression is still haunting you and you remember what Jesus said: "You reap what you sow." Maybe you also remember that Paul taught not to suffer for sin, but rather suffer for the cause of Christ.  Oh what guilt!  What we want has great bearing in how we will respond to the truth.  The Bible is clear to tell us that God not only wants right action, but the passion of the soul, the driving want of a person.  When someone asks if you are willing to give it all up for Jesus, that is what they mean.  To lay down all want for this world or anything in it and give it to God.  The question remains: "What can I do about this problem?"  I ask the same question every time I sin against a righteous and Holy God.  I do remember what Jesus told the disciples after watching the rich young ruler walk away after being asked to sell all he had.  Jesus said: "It is easier for a camel to walk through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter into heaven."  then the disciples said: "Who then can be saved!"  Jesus replied: "With man this is impossible, but not with God."  This is the only hope that I have.  A hope that God would find it in His great heart to forgive me of such horrid offenses such as the ones that I have committed.  If He won't save me then I don't have a chance.  I lean on the mercy of God, and fight against my sin with vehement veracity.  I will not stop until I have achieved victory.  Join me in this battle.  It is the battle for our souls.